Friday, November 25, 2016
I Fell Off A Cliff*
I Fell Off A Cliff
I mean, not literally. Maybe it's more like a rabbit hole. At any rate, I am somewhere I don't want to be, and I am just hanging out there until I can find a way to help myself get the hell out of there.
I feel like I am waiting for something to happen. That everything is in flux, or in status, or in a holding pattern. I can't quite put my finger on the why or the how, but this is the overall feeling I am getting about 2016.
I wrote the above back in September/October.
I still can't put my finger on it, but 2016 seems like it was a really weird year, y'know? I am entering these last months (shit balls!) with a lack of energy, and a desire to just get through the year and start fresh in January.
On the other hand, that's not really fair.
To myself, to my goals, to anyone.
I had a little "check in" with myself the other night. I wrote in my "Dear Lisa" notebook for the first time in a couple of months. And I have decided to make room in my life for room. For reflection. For a small plan to make the most out of the rest of 2016 and start 2017 on the right foot. I've already got some BIG PLANS that are going to take time and effort to execute. I am nervous and excited. And I am so damn ready. I might even get a cat.
"Dear Lisa. You need to be a little selfish right now and figure out what you need to do to give yourself some peace and happiness. You are allowed to be low and sad, but you can't focus on that! Remember 2013...that was a tough year for you, but it was also a great year! Just think, and you will discover and remember why that year was awesome and learn from it."